Things I've pondered today.

I have lots of friends. Some of them are peachy. Today, a lot of them weren't. I have friends who are guarded, I have friends who've been abused, I have friends who've been raped, I have friends who've been neglected, and I have friends who've had it bad for longer than they can remember by no fault of their own. The worst part about all of those situations is that most of them were brought about by family members that hurt them. Why the heck do so many people in the world have to be so ridiculously sucky to the people they're supposed to love?! The people you're supposed to care about the most, the people that you share blood with and some people can't show them the respect to treat them like human beings! Instead they're objects, expendable things to be used and then thrown away when thoroughly satisfied. How do people get that messed up? How in the world do you treat another person with that much cruelty? I don't get it. I'm on the far opposite end of the scale. I can't help but feel for all of my friends who've been mistreated or hurt. The effect of their plight on my soul becomes my disturbed prayer full of fervency for hope and eventual peace. Their tears hit the ground like boulders on my chest, knocking air out of my lungs, stealing breath from my body, as they choke up telling me all of the barbaric injustices they endured as I listen in complete incredulity.How can one stay passive when others threaten harm? Is a plea for help not a call to arms? Why is it that so many people are a waste of time if they aren't related by blood? I question how one cannot be angry when one considers the repercussions of rape. How can someone not rage over someone being hurt to their core, having that which was meant for delicate passion defiled and vulgarly spat upon by those who's perversion has reached a pinnacle? How can one not scream a bloody murder "How dare you lay a hand on her!" when your loved one is bruised? How can one not feel intoxicated with wrath when people are taken advantage of or taken for granted until their value in the eyes of their abuser is less than that of an object?  Less than, less than..... that's all I heard today. Cries over feelings elicited by people that made my friends feel less than; less than human, less than someone else, less than a daughter, less than a friend, less than a lover. Why is it that people can be so narcissistic as to not take notice of their hurt or not seek to help them when they do? I don't get how so many people can mistreat someone that they push them to a point where they feel that there is no one on this earth that truly loves them at all. NOT ONE.... I mean is there no one who get's it? Out of all the people in this country that proclaim Christianity as a faith, why is it that there are so few church people that get that that giant book they keep in their bedside tables gives one instruction, to love. Despite race, color, creed, view point, perspective, region of origin.  If every self-proclaimed Christian were doing their job, there wouldn't be people who feel like no one loves them. I wouldn't be spewing word vomit all over the internet about how I agonize over how much my friends hurt and why I feel so badly that I can't help my friends because they won't let me for fear of being hurt again. My words don't apply to everyone, but they sure apply to a heck of a lot more of us than they should. So...
What the heck world?




What the heck are we doing to ourselves?

Dance With Me

Heart-felt monologues can set a mood and flowers may go a long way to say I love you, but when I really want to know the extent of your affections, I'll ask you to dance with me.

Because a slow dance is possibly, the most sensual, captivating gesture known to men.

If you accept my hand and lean in close, I know that you are completely comfortable being vulnerable with me, that you enjoy being in my arms. You know you're safe here.

Your chin gracing my shoulder and tendrils of your hair grazing my cheeks and my chin send my heart into rhythms only hummingbird's wings can match. Though my heart is racing, it's laughing with all of the joy in the world.

My mind has never been more alert.

Not only am I aware of every molecule of my own existence but of every part of your being as well. Your slender legs and graceful feet keeping time with the melody, my heart is still laughing, reciting the lyrics set to the beat I feel echoing in the ambiance.

So sway to some old school Jazz. Let Miles Davis and Billie Holiday melt the world away.

My worries and troubles are no more when your fingers curve around my palms. They disappeared because I'm with you, so don't you worry about knowing the steps or not.

Trust me and let me guide you. Feel the rhythm my heart is making for you and melt into my arms. Rest your head on my shoulder and just be.

When I said I'd save myself for you, I didn't just mean for consummating marriage.

I have saved myself for this moment, this dance with you.